I will have to Apologize for the Hibernation.
Lost in translation I should say...
For the very few constant visitors... Here is the time train...
Graduated ...Employed...Tennesseed...Married...Will be Coming soon...With a new post as well!
Feels Good to be here...!
Will write soon...Thanks for all the appreciation/motivation.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Earliest Thought Pictured!
A few days ago, I was reading this book from a reasonably popular and young author who irked this thought
“What is the earliest memory of your own life that you can picture?”
I have never thought about it before and I should say the process of tracing back to the first picture on your mental albom is quite an interesting one. It is pretty much similar yet amazingly different from what you would do with your digital images! As you rewind, the pixel count decreases analogous to your memory…you finally end up in scanned versions in your computer and here you scan your entire memory to get oldest versions from your hidden folders!
It could be different to you, but for me I could not say that I have this one particular moment I can trace back to. It would probably because the brain does not have the ability to correlate the earliest memory with my age and hence it is a little vague on the time line. So, I am still not in great understanding on which one was the earliest as far as the occurrence is concerned.
So I looked back! These are the ones that came to my mind!
1. My Grandfather walking inside my aunt’s place as I was running around the house
2. My father walking in from Tirupathi after his tonsure!
3. Me giving a yellow rose to my kinder garden teacher, telling her that I got her the yellow rose because I knew she would be wearing a yellow saree that day (the flirt).
4. Getting dressed up and going to school in my good old blue and white uniform.
5. Letting my kinder garden girl friend Sujatha carry my backpack and lunch bag holding my hands and take me to our reserved corner of the classroom!
I don’t have any memory of me being a kid sitting on someone’s lap as they feed me dinner! I don’t have any memory of anyone putting me to sleep in my crib. No memory of those kinds whatsoever!
I wonder why? May be I was too young to register anything. So, when do one start to register something in the infinite memory space!
What is so special about these memories I listed above is that it still hangs in there as opposed to the other pictures that I fail to recover? I thought about them, and ofcourse I found the reasons for all of them being there, as it holds their unique importance, which is certainly of no interest to you as a reader. However, I can certainly see myself thinking about my current present later in the future trying to capture them as pictures! If you were to do it …what would linger in your mind and why? If we do find an answer to that question are we currently justifying the respect we would give to that memory years later by living it or are letting it pass as one of those moments that we would never be able picture!?
If you still have not short listed who are the possible authors who might have irked this….ask me or read the post again with your eyes open for the clue!
“What is the earliest memory of your own life that you can picture?”
I have never thought about it before and I should say the process of tracing back to the first picture on your mental albom is quite an interesting one. It is pretty much similar yet amazingly different from what you would do with your digital images! As you rewind, the pixel count decreases analogous to your memory…you finally end up in scanned versions in your computer and here you scan your entire memory to get oldest versions from your hidden folders!
It could be different to you, but for me I could not say that I have this one particular moment I can trace back to. It would probably because the brain does not have the ability to correlate the earliest memory with my age and hence it is a little vague on the time line. So, I am still not in great understanding on which one was the earliest as far as the occurrence is concerned.
So I looked back! These are the ones that came to my mind!
1. My Grandfather walking inside my aunt’s place as I was running around the house
2. My father walking in from Tirupathi after his tonsure!
3. Me giving a yellow rose to my kinder garden teacher, telling her that I got her the yellow rose because I knew she would be wearing a yellow saree that day (the flirt).
4. Getting dressed up and going to school in my good old blue and white uniform.
5. Letting my kinder garden girl friend Sujatha carry my backpack and lunch bag holding my hands and take me to our reserved corner of the classroom!
I don’t have any memory of me being a kid sitting on someone’s lap as they feed me dinner! I don’t have any memory of anyone putting me to sleep in my crib. No memory of those kinds whatsoever!
I wonder why? May be I was too young to register anything. So, when do one start to register something in the infinite memory space!
What is so special about these memories I listed above is that it still hangs in there as opposed to the other pictures that I fail to recover? I thought about them, and ofcourse I found the reasons for all of them being there, as it holds their unique importance, which is certainly of no interest to you as a reader. However, I can certainly see myself thinking about my current present later in the future trying to capture them as pictures! If you were to do it …what would linger in your mind and why? If we do find an answer to that question are we currently justifying the respect we would give to that memory years later by living it or are letting it pass as one of those moments that we would never be able picture!?
If you still have not short listed who are the possible authors who might have irked this….ask me or read the post again with your eyes open for the clue!
Thursday, July 17, 2008
The Hindu
After a while...(or may be it was not that long ago) I am going to complain!
I think I have mentioned this in one of my earlier posts; it’s about the obsession on a few websites that almost every one of us has… to begin the day with. It’s like morning business…. If you skip it…you have a day ahead that you would not want to handle. I was reading one of those websites this morning and realized that there used to be days where we would fight for the morning-few-minute-glimpse of “The Hindu”. If you are one of those who have the privilege of calling yourself a Mylaporeian…I guess you could relate to this much better. Nevertheless, it is probably the case with a whole lot of people who were a part of the newspaper generation in South India. The same fights have been for a lot other newspapers as well and even for the Tamil/English magazines that come with that. The fight has been with parents, siblings, and even with Roomies! It was not one of the cute fights you would see in movies, this one is filled with blood baths, mean remarks and profanities running all over the place! I have witnessed respects shattering on these kinds of fights.
Jokes apart!
May be I was busy graduating, but suddenly I realize that I have survived, I repeat survived, the last few years of my life without taking a glimpse of the newspaper. Now, this is certainly for people who agree that reading news from the website is not an equivalent replacement to the raw newspaper. Call me green-un-conscious or digitally challenged or from the generation stubborn or whatever, I really don’t have an ear for it. The feeling of waking up with a laptop is no way nearer to the one I got with the newspaper.
Of course, I get to read the newspaper even now, almost every day. Is it as exciting as it was from a normal paper format?
Hell NO.
Yes, I know that they do have an e-paper, which btw I tried…. but for some reason…I could probably say that I felt similar to playing book cricket on a 5 ‘0 clock Madras evening.
With the digital revolution et al, I guess its time to quit complaining and move on. We are at the age when news comes to your pillow side on your mobile. Pick that up and get the news. You really don’t have the time to get up early and read the newspaper in and out with the morning coffee and breakfast with your best friend by your side, before you get to work/school. I am sure you would rather appreciate the few minutes of sleep that you get in the morning because of your long phone conversation with the same best friend the previous night after postponing that for a few months, who btw is miles apart cribbing about the same thing.
I have started to appreciate James Cameroon’s hidden/obvious message in The Terminator more and more now a days.
I think I have mentioned this in one of my earlier posts; it’s about the obsession on a few websites that almost every one of us has… to begin the day with. It’s like morning business…. If you skip it…you have a day ahead that you would not want to handle. I was reading one of those websites this morning and realized that there used to be days where we would fight for the morning-few-minute-glimpse of “The Hindu”. If you are one of those who have the privilege of calling yourself a Mylaporeian…I guess you could relate to this much better. Nevertheless, it is probably the case with a whole lot of people who were a part of the newspaper generation in South India. The same fights have been for a lot other newspapers as well and even for the Tamil/English magazines that come with that. The fight has been with parents, siblings, and even with Roomies! It was not one of the cute fights you would see in movies, this one is filled with blood baths, mean remarks and profanities running all over the place! I have witnessed respects shattering on these kinds of fights.
Jokes apart!
May be I was busy graduating, but suddenly I realize that I have survived, I repeat survived, the last few years of my life without taking a glimpse of the newspaper. Now, this is certainly for people who agree that reading news from the website is not an equivalent replacement to the raw newspaper. Call me green-un-conscious or digitally challenged or from the generation stubborn or whatever, I really don’t have an ear for it. The feeling of waking up with a laptop is no way nearer to the one I got with the newspaper.
Of course, I get to read the newspaper even now, almost every day. Is it as exciting as it was from a normal paper format?
Hell NO.
Yes, I know that they do have an e-paper, which btw I tried…. but for some reason…I could probably say that I felt similar to playing book cricket on a 5 ‘0 clock Madras evening.
With the digital revolution et al, I guess its time to quit complaining and move on. We are at the age when news comes to your pillow side on your mobile. Pick that up and get the news. You really don’t have the time to get up early and read the newspaper in and out with the morning coffee and breakfast with your best friend by your side, before you get to work/school. I am sure you would rather appreciate the few minutes of sleep that you get in the morning because of your long phone conversation with the same best friend the previous night after postponing that for a few months, who btw is miles apart cribbing about the same thing.
I have started to appreciate James Cameroon’s hidden/obvious message in The Terminator more and more now a days.
I guess I am trying to say I miss the raw version of “The Hindu”, trust me it is not easy to find a replacement.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
What way?
Recently, most of my work-time is spent in Lake Jackson, TX. A small town few miles south of Houston. It is quite an interesting place which offers limited entertainment and a lot of workime. So apart of getting some work done, I get to move around and know this place a little better as well. Following is a excerpt from one of the few interesting conversations happened here a few weeks ago....
"So..Anyways... you getting some work done?"
"Always" I said. "How do I get to Subway?"
"If you get past this way and that way...."
I was trying to look at what she was pointing.....and was puzzled quite a bit! mainly because she was not point at anything.
"Excuse me?"
"Yeah...if you get past this way and that way..." and she lost me right there....
What the heck...is she trying to make fun of me or am I hearing Chinese...
I pulled myself together and asked her..."Where are you pointing at?...I can't understand what you are saying....we keep coming in circle ways!"
"Naaa..Naa....not the circle way...I said this way and that way..."
No way!....This is BS...I can't take this anymore..I waved my hands at her...can you atleast see me....Cant you see me looking like a lost child in an Chennai Exhibition!
"Okay...!" and she pulled her map and pointed at something ....and that's when I understood...
She did not mean this way and that way....she meant This way and That way...
"I am sorry...we were going in circle ways..." I said...
"You dont have to go that far...its pretty close to Winding way"
"Anyway I had it for the day...I will rather stay away from this!" :)
"Dont go to Any way it might be far away" she giggled
Lukily someone on the way mentioned that it is not good to park on the Parking way or His way, when you want to go to Subway.
In the end, I said "I am glad there is no way called No way"
"So..Anyways... you getting some work done?"
"Always" I said. "How do I get to Subway?"
"If you get past this way and that way...."
I was trying to look at what she was pointing.....and was puzzled quite a bit! mainly because she was not point at anything.
"Excuse me?"
"Yeah...if you get past this way and that way..." and she lost me right there....
What the heck...is she trying to make fun of me or am I hearing Chinese...
I pulled myself together and asked her..."Where are you pointing at?...I can't understand what you are saying....we keep coming in circle ways!"
"Naaa..Naa....not the circle way...I said this way and that way..."
No way!....This is BS...I can't take this anymore..I waved my hands at her...can you atleast see me....Cant you see me looking like a lost child in an Chennai Exhibition!
"Okay...!" and she pulled her map and pointed at something ....and that's when I understood...
She did not mean this way and that way....she meant This way and That way...
"I am sorry...we were going in circle ways..." I said...
"You dont have to go that far...its pretty close to Winding way"
"Anyway I had it for the day...I will rather stay away from this!" :)
"Dont go to Any way it might be far away" she giggled
Lukily someone on the way mentioned that it is not good to park on the Parking way or His way, when you want to go to Subway.
In the end, I said "I am glad there is no way called No way"
From Wikepedia...on Lake Jackson
All streets radiating from downtown end in the word “Way”. Among the
streets are Center Way, Winding Way, Circle Way, and Parking Way. There is an
intersection of two streets named “This Way” and “That Way”. In the same spirit,
a local church near Bess Brannen Elementary placed a small sign in their
driveway named "His Way". You will also find an "Any Way".
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Get used to it?
“Did you see Saw?”
“Yeah I saw Saw and it was pretty good….”
“So, if you are in to gory movies you might like this”, he suggested.
Every now and then I go to Hollywood video store to pick up some movies that the store guy suggests. Sometimes it turns out to be good and sometimes a total failure. I stumbled in to Memento like this, and so did I with Little Nicky. The girl who suggested Little Nicky movie to be a hilarious one was real hot…so I had to take it…. needless to say…it was a total failure…
“Yeah…I like gory movies…I will see and let you know how good or bad this is”
“So why do you like gory movies?” a middle aged man with glasses thicker than my eyebrows, jumped right in to the conversation from the next aisle.
“The same reason, why I like movies…may be to see or perceive things that I cannot experience on a personal level”
“This generation of people are so much in to these kind of movies and they increase their tolerance limit”, he shook his head in disdain, “This makes them tolerate bad things that happen around them, the ones they would not have tolerated before! I can give it to you in writing that you would tolerate less violence to you and your community if you have not seen these kind of movies”
Both the store guy and myself did not want to argue/appreciate such a statement/conversation from a person who is visibly frustrated and reasonable sensible…. so we yesed him for a while…maintained his boiling point state…and made the monologue look and sound like a dialogue with one word responses….
Unlike this particular incident where I chose to shut up (which btw is very rare), I like talking to people of this kind. People who let their frustration out and understand time in a generic pattern through their specific experiences. I am not saying am in agreement or disagreement with his piece of thought, yet. All I’m saying is that I appreciate such thought processes that starts from a tinge of personal flavor to a lesson addressing the larger picture. There is always something you learn out of such conversations that stay with you for a longer period of time.
Well, parallel processing of life lessons led me to the point of correlating his thought process to my lifestyle. Not literally though.
Often times I come across circumstances that leads to the point where the answer is “I will get used to it. It’s a matter of time”. My question to myself here is that “Does this really mean anything?”
Why would one have to get used to something that he/she is not comfortable with, in the first place? Why would we have to compromise and reason life by understanding occurrences as a messenger device to learn time and truth?
Of course am talking from the perspective where he/she has enough knowledge to talk about the comfortability level. So the clan, which claims to be uncomfortable without exploring what it is all about, is totally out of the discussion and respect here.
So, when do we pull the plug and say…that’s it …I am moving on …I don’t want this anymore!
“Yeah I saw Saw and it was pretty good….”
“So, if you are in to gory movies you might like this”, he suggested.
Every now and then I go to Hollywood video store to pick up some movies that the store guy suggests. Sometimes it turns out to be good and sometimes a total failure. I stumbled in to Memento like this, and so did I with Little Nicky. The girl who suggested Little Nicky movie to be a hilarious one was real hot…so I had to take it…. needless to say…it was a total failure…
“Yeah…I like gory movies…I will see and let you know how good or bad this is”
“So why do you like gory movies?” a middle aged man with glasses thicker than my eyebrows, jumped right in to the conversation from the next aisle.
“The same reason, why I like movies…may be to see or perceive things that I cannot experience on a personal level”
“This generation of people are so much in to these kind of movies and they increase their tolerance limit”, he shook his head in disdain, “This makes them tolerate bad things that happen around them, the ones they would not have tolerated before! I can give it to you in writing that you would tolerate less violence to you and your community if you have not seen these kind of movies”
Both the store guy and myself did not want to argue/appreciate such a statement/conversation from a person who is visibly frustrated and reasonable sensible…. so we yesed him for a while…maintained his boiling point state…and made the monologue look and sound like a dialogue with one word responses….
Unlike this particular incident where I chose to shut up (which btw is very rare), I like talking to people of this kind. People who let their frustration out and understand time in a generic pattern through their specific experiences. I am not saying am in agreement or disagreement with his piece of thought, yet. All I’m saying is that I appreciate such thought processes that starts from a tinge of personal flavor to a lesson addressing the larger picture. There is always something you learn out of such conversations that stay with you for a longer period of time.
Well, parallel processing of life lessons led me to the point of correlating his thought process to my lifestyle. Not literally though.
Often times I come across circumstances that leads to the point where the answer is “I will get used to it. It’s a matter of time”. My question to myself here is that “Does this really mean anything?”
Why would one have to get used to something that he/she is not comfortable with, in the first place? Why would we have to compromise and reason life by understanding occurrences as a messenger device to learn time and truth?
Of course am talking from the perspective where he/she has enough knowledge to talk about the comfortability level. So the clan, which claims to be uncomfortable without exploring what it is all about, is totally out of the discussion and respect here.
So, when do we pull the plug and say…that’s it …I am moving on …I don’t want this anymore!
Or do we ever say that?
When there is a whole spectrum or right and wrong with great overlaps, calling it quits based on what is right and wrong is nearly impossible at certain circumstances. Also, there are so many things that happen around us that we are not in agreement with. If we rebel everything that we are not comfortable with, we would have to lose all the time rebelling without enjoying what we have. So, it boils down to priorities and on the quality of compromises.
Gandhi insisted in getting used to the process of earning freedom with Ahimsa, but he always rebelled against getting used to the so-called “freedom” we thought we had. I guess you get the point. But how many of us can trust the Gandhi inside you who tells you to get used to something that you are not comfortable with, to reap real benefits later. Can you trust that voice inside you that sometimes has a vision with just guts and instincts? If yes…then for how long? is the question that follows!
On the plane of multiple options, I think life is like playing Rummy. You will have to get used to the first set of cards and look for the right cards that would fill in for a win. If you are not leading anywhere as you lose time, you just have to change the sets you have and create new ones and play them for a win. You may get that old card that would have filled in for win just moments later, but could you do anything about it? Nope. You just respect your decision and move on! And interestingly sometimes you would not play for your own win….and that is the brilliance of understanding this!
On the other hand, when you firmly believe on something for some reason that you personally understand or don’t, you must differentiate it from the rummy kinds, by holding on to it until time proves that you are right always…. or even wrong sometimes… as long as you have the ability to see what you take home when you are right or wrong…I think you are safe minds!
Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Stuck
Lately, I have been spending quite a bit of my time by myself. The quality(!) time that I have been getting to spend with someone I love (me - as Woody Allen in Annie Hall says) has led me to visualize world from a photographic perspective...I am neither claiming this to be my new found hobby..nor am trying to be an amateur expert...Its just that, sometimes I get to see these places and things that makes me think ...
oh..f&^&...I wish I am a real photographer to capture this in film than in mind... ...
So, in such attempts to capture something’s I have seen with a pinch of crazy thought process.... I am starting an irregular series of posts with pictures and may be some messages...So, here I go, with the first one.
Image source: Picture taken in Quintana beach, TX, 05/05/2008
Staying grounded lets me see the world I conquered and the world that conquered me!
If am not stuck here, may be I would have conquered the rest of the world!
If am not stuck here, may be I would have conquered the rest of the world!
You are welcome to add any quotes to this!
Friday, May 02, 2008
Railway station, Name Board and a Red checked shirt…!
Have you ever seen people holding boards with some names in the airport receiving area, and wondered if you would ever get to be received like that?
Have you ever thought more and asked yourself do they have the right names? What if they had something like “Hell …Welcomes.. Moron of the millennium” or something stupendously funny!
Well a guy asked me to such a thing once.
This is about one of those guys I knew from Cookeville. .....
Have you ever thought more and asked yourself do they have the right names? What if they had something like “Hell …Welcomes.. Moron of the millennium” or something stupendously funny!
Well a guy asked me to such a thing once.
This is about one of those guys I knew from Cookeville. .....
have to edit some super mean lines by the author who later thought it needs to be deleted..appreciate for pointing it out.....
... and this happened in one of my high on ego days....so bear with me!
It was sometime in November 2003 when he stopped me on my way to my apartment and was for some reason….he was overtly nice asking about how and whereabouts. I was almost thrown back to rethink about his sexual orientation for such a display of his new found affection. I thought….
Is he all right…I don’t know about you buddy…but am straight…don’t friggin hit on me!
Then a day later, I was walking the same way…. again this guy stopped me….this time he wanted a favor….
Now I think I can pattern recognize….
“So what can I not do for you….oops I mean what kind of a favor you want”
“Dude you are going to India this December right, could you be of any help to me there?”
Well yeah…. I can teach what life is all about and let you know how to live….atleast in my own idiotic way….
“Yeah! If that’s something that I could do…sure why not”
May be he wants me to get some package to or from India….Oh God …these package monsters have already started their killings…even a month before my trip…..I am going to be victimized now…how many…3, 4 or 5 lbs of chocolate and FedEx….not again….why are these people doing this to me in spite of me not telling anyone to deliver or bring anything to me…save me...!
“I am coming to India sometime mid December…..”
Ahh! Thank you God …he is not one of those folks with their humungous packages!
“….I will be flying in to Chennai ….I have a friend who is coming from Hyderabad to receive me in the airport and go with me to my home town….he is new to Chennai and he is my best friend …..he comes sometime in the morning and he does not have any place to go to in Chennai …would you be with him and entertain him for the day…I would be taking the train that night to Hyderabad …if my flight comes on time…else I will have to take the next day morning train….”
Did he say entertain?
“What do you want me to do exactly?”
“Well…basically….”
I don’t know what is that almost every other Indian (including myself sometimes) use this basically word to begin a sentence…. why would everything start from a basic level…even if you are in middle of the conversation…is it just an Indian thing?
“…you will have to receive him from the Central station and take a car from a local travels….put him in a lodge closer to the airport ….take him around the city …show him places…wait for me to come to the airport in the evening and drop us later in the Railway station that night else next day morning….that’s it!”
That’s it!? Then you should wake up and go back to school starting all the way from kinder garden…
“Dude…are you high on dope or something…you realize what you are asking here right….you don’t even know me that well….and I am going there for a mere 20 odd days and you are asking me to spend a day with you and your beloved friend…? Are you out of your mind?”
I was not able to bear a face of disappointment.
“Okay…I can do a part of it…not all …I can receive him from the Railway station and may be drop somewhere closer to the airport the same morning after breakfast or lunch…I cant spend the whole day with him…Honestly I don’t foresee having anytime …you can try other people who are coming to Chennai and ask if they are of any help”
“I did…and Balaji said he could be of some help”
I don’t understand this …I don’t know why people ask a same favor to two people and not let the two know about it…
A couple of days later….
“Barath…I spoke to my friend ….he said he is glad that you are coming to receive him…”
“Do you have ticket details and such?”
“Nope”
“How am I going to know who is he?”
“Do you have his picture or something?”
“Nope”
“You don’t have a picture of your best friend..?”
“No….May be you can do this…”
“What? Take a picture when I meet him?”
“No....Can you have a Name board with my friend’s name and stand in the Railway station so he can come by to you directly?”
“Are you kidding me? What do you think am doing for you….a favor buddy…remember that…am not going to go and hold some board with your friends name on it!”
“Okay…okay…I understand”
Then he asked me that….I don’t have a clue what his thought process was just before he was telling this…..he was god damn serious….
“Can you do this then?”
“What?”
“Can you hold a name board telling that your name is Barath? So he can find you directly and talk to you?”, he was drop dead serious….!
There are several moments in my life where I was completely bowled over by someone’s thought process…. this is certainly in the top 10….
Did he just say what I think and heard as what he said?
After few moments of silence and shock, “Dude…WTF is your problem man….do you expect me to hold a board with my name on it….so everyone on their way out of their train…come to me and congratulate me for being the Barath I can be?…..!!@&^#(*&@", he reacted in a..May-be-you-are-correct way.....
What is the reaction...? Dude...you need some serious help!
If I do what he had told me to do...
What would I look like… May be like this?
Then I suggested that his friend would wait for a while in the same platform as the train arrived….and come with a specific shirt color of his choice and let me know about it earlier….the point was to go a little later so he would be all by himself with the shirt I know…so would be easy to get hold of him…..sounded like a fool proof plan…
The day before he called me to say that it was a 4 30 am train.! I had to say no to the previously arranged temple visit and was bored of getting all the thrashing from parents for not visiting god for a guy I don’t even know and like..
The day came and I was told he would come with a red checked shirt….twice… I was told red checked shirt…..
I drove to the station around 5 with my friend….and went around looking for the man with red checked shirt …..and no where I found anyone of that sort…The central station was huge and after an hour of search in vain I called it quits….These were the days with no cell phones and stuff….so I have no way of communicating to this guy!….All that guy had was my home phone number….so I called my folks to see if someone called for me …and Nope… was the answer….. I was pissed to the core….
I was reminded of the quote that goes on the lines like…."Tell me about your friends …I will tell about you”…!
May be I should have guessed it
I guess I will have a long day… I thought to myself before heading back home
I stepped back in to my home and the phone rang…the guy calls me from the station and after waiting for more than 2 hours…I told him to get an auto and reach my place….
Cirrreeeeeng! The calling bell cracked….
I opened the door and there was this guy……
“...Hey.....You are Barath….I saw you in the station”
“What? You could have stopped me!”
“You were running up and down …looking for someone….I never knew it was me you were looking for”
I was even more pissed…!
Then he took his books out of his small tiny bag and asked me if I could tell him where the library is as he intended to pursue some reading before meeting his friend….!
That was the most simple looking person I have ever met.
I was dumbfounded again …in a nicer way…he did not ask about food…shower…what do we do next…anything…..Library!…that’s the first thing he asked!
He stayed there at my place for a few minutes and he said he had coupled some important academic things so he wanted to visit the Egmore library and left soon after the shower and breakfast. While he was leaving, I asked him…..
“What happened to the red checked shirt?”
“No…! He told me blue checked shirt…..Twice…he insisted blue checked shirt….”
I was dumbfounded again
Now I am sure that quote is not exactly true in all cases….!
It was sometime in November 2003 when he stopped me on my way to my apartment and was for some reason….he was overtly nice asking about how and whereabouts. I was almost thrown back to rethink about his sexual orientation for such a display of his new found affection. I thought….
Is he all right…I don’t know about you buddy…but am straight…don’t friggin hit on me!
Then a day later, I was walking the same way…. again this guy stopped me….this time he wanted a favor….
Now I think I can pattern recognize….
“So what can I not do for you….oops I mean what kind of a favor you want”
“Dude you are going to India this December right, could you be of any help to me there?”
Well yeah…. I can teach what life is all about and let you know how to live….atleast in my own idiotic way….
“Yeah! If that’s something that I could do…sure why not”
May be he wants me to get some package to or from India….Oh God …these package monsters have already started their killings…even a month before my trip…..I am going to be victimized now…how many…3, 4 or 5 lbs of chocolate and FedEx….not again….why are these people doing this to me in spite of me not telling anyone to deliver or bring anything to me…save me...!
“I am coming to India sometime mid December…..”
Ahh! Thank you God …he is not one of those folks with their humungous packages!
“….I will be flying in to Chennai ….I have a friend who is coming from Hyderabad to receive me in the airport and go with me to my home town….he is new to Chennai and he is my best friend …..he comes sometime in the morning and he does not have any place to go to in Chennai …would you be with him and entertain him for the day…I would be taking the train that night to Hyderabad …if my flight comes on time…else I will have to take the next day morning train….”
Did he say entertain?
“What do you want me to do exactly?”
“Well…basically….”
I don’t know what is that almost every other Indian (including myself sometimes) use this basically word to begin a sentence…. why would everything start from a basic level…even if you are in middle of the conversation…is it just an Indian thing?
“…you will have to receive him from the Central station and take a car from a local travels….put him in a lodge closer to the airport ….take him around the city …show him places…wait for me to come to the airport in the evening and drop us later in the Railway station that night else next day morning….that’s it!”
That’s it!? Then you should wake up and go back to school starting all the way from kinder garden…
“Dude…are you high on dope or something…you realize what you are asking here right….you don’t even know me that well….and I am going there for a mere 20 odd days and you are asking me to spend a day with you and your beloved friend…? Are you out of your mind?”
I was not able to bear a face of disappointment.
“Okay…I can do a part of it…not all …I can receive him from the Railway station and may be drop somewhere closer to the airport the same morning after breakfast or lunch…I cant spend the whole day with him…Honestly I don’t foresee having anytime …you can try other people who are coming to Chennai and ask if they are of any help”
“I did…and Balaji said he could be of some help”
I don’t understand this …I don’t know why people ask a same favor to two people and not let the two know about it…
A couple of days later….
“Barath…I spoke to my friend ….he said he is glad that you are coming to receive him…”
“Do you have ticket details and such?”
“Nope”
“How am I going to know who is he?”
“Do you have his picture or something?”
“Nope”
“You don’t have a picture of your best friend..?”
“No….May be you can do this…”
“What? Take a picture when I meet him?”
“No....Can you have a Name board with my friend’s name and stand in the Railway station so he can come by to you directly?”
“Are you kidding me? What do you think am doing for you….a favor buddy…remember that…am not going to go and hold some board with your friends name on it!”
“Okay…okay…I understand”
Then he asked me that….I don’t have a clue what his thought process was just before he was telling this…..he was god damn serious….
“Can you do this then?”
“What?”
“Can you hold a name board telling that your name is Barath? So he can find you directly and talk to you?”, he was drop dead serious….!
There are several moments in my life where I was completely bowled over by someone’s thought process…. this is certainly in the top 10….
Did he just say what I think and heard as what he said?
After few moments of silence and shock, “Dude…WTF is your problem man….do you expect me to hold a board with my name on it….so everyone on their way out of their train…come to me and congratulate me for being the Barath I can be?…..!!@&^#(*&@", he reacted in a..May-be-you-are-correct way.....
What is the reaction...? Dude...you need some serious help!
If I do what he had told me to do...
What would I look like… May be like this?
Then I suggested that his friend would wait for a while in the same platform as the train arrived….and come with a specific shirt color of his choice and let me know about it earlier….the point was to go a little later so he would be all by himself with the shirt I know…so would be easy to get hold of him…..sounded like a fool proof plan…
The day before he called me to say that it was a 4 30 am train.! I had to say no to the previously arranged temple visit and was bored of getting all the thrashing from parents for not visiting god for a guy I don’t even know and like..
The day came and I was told he would come with a red checked shirt….twice… I was told red checked shirt…..
I drove to the station around 5 with my friend….and went around looking for the man with red checked shirt …..and no where I found anyone of that sort…The central station was huge and after an hour of search in vain I called it quits….These were the days with no cell phones and stuff….so I have no way of communicating to this guy!….All that guy had was my home phone number….so I called my folks to see if someone called for me …and Nope… was the answer….. I was pissed to the core….
I was reminded of the quote that goes on the lines like…."Tell me about your friends …I will tell about you”…!
May be I should have guessed it
I guess I will have a long day… I thought to myself before heading back home
I stepped back in to my home and the phone rang…the guy calls me from the station and after waiting for more than 2 hours…I told him to get an auto and reach my place….
Cirrreeeeeng! The calling bell cracked….
I opened the door and there was this guy……
“...Hey.....You are Barath….I saw you in the station”
“What? You could have stopped me!”
“You were running up and down …looking for someone….I never knew it was me you were looking for”
I was even more pissed…!
Then he took his books out of his small tiny bag and asked me if I could tell him where the library is as he intended to pursue some reading before meeting his friend….!
That was the most simple looking person I have ever met.
I was dumbfounded again …in a nicer way…he did not ask about food…shower…what do we do next…anything…..Library!…that’s the first thing he asked!
He stayed there at my place for a few minutes and he said he had coupled some important academic things so he wanted to visit the Egmore library and left soon after the shower and breakfast. While he was leaving, I asked him…..
“What happened to the red checked shirt?”
“No…! He told me blue checked shirt…..Twice…he insisted blue checked shirt….”
I was dumbfounded again
Now I am sure that quote is not exactly true in all cases….!
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Chennai.....Cleaner?
A quickie!
Recently, I have been (y)telling to my folks about how I miss Chennai...I have been rambling all over about how I get a chance to talk to my parents every weekend ...but not to the city....so on and so forth...!
Then... I stumble upon the news on Making Chennai Cleaner and the subsequent blogasms about it...! A step towards cleanliness that is well taken! If the implementation turns out to be as good as the idea, I am sure Chennai will be a much cleaner place to live!
Also, Google found another piece of news (ibn link not working) stating that last year Chennai was rated as the cleanliest metro in the country...which was quite an interesting fact. I never thought Chennai could be right there, but then my 4-1/2 years of virtual vision holds no justice to this end. On the other end...will the cleaner Chennai with these restrictions would be as good as the Chennai I knew? A toughie.. I should say...but I am sure Chennai will find a way to save its originality in spite of the innumerable transitions...positives and negatives!
All said, I guess the days when the lyrics of "Sorgame endralum..." turning out be appropriate to our very own Chennai is not far away...
Recently, I have been (y)telling to my folks about how I miss Chennai...I have been rambling all over about how I get a chance to talk to my parents every weekend ...but not to the city....so on and so forth...!
Then... I stumble upon the news on Making Chennai Cleaner and the subsequent blogasms about it...! A step towards cleanliness that is well taken! If the implementation turns out to be as good as the idea, I am sure Chennai will be a much cleaner place to live!
Also, Google found another piece of news (ibn link not working) stating that last year Chennai was rated as the cleanliest metro in the country...which was quite an interesting fact. I never thought Chennai could be right there, but then my 4-1/2 years of virtual vision holds no justice to this end. On the other end...will the cleaner Chennai with these restrictions would be as good as the Chennai I knew? A toughie.. I should say...but I am sure Chennai will find a way to save its originality in spite of the innumerable transitions...positives and negatives!
All said, I guess the days when the lyrics of "Sorgame endralum..." turning out be appropriate to our very own Chennai is not far away...
Friday, March 28, 2008
An affair to remember!
“You spend the entire day with me…looking right into my eyes most of the time …running your fingers all over my body…. glancing every inch of it…and yet…..and yet you say…. you want to spend the weekend without seeing any of me?”, she was furious.
“Yep. Pretty much!”, I said.
“Barath, I am having serious doubts about us”, she was concerned
“Listen…there is someone else..... as well”. I did not know where I had the guts to tell that to her
She was dumbfounded! She did not know how to react…!
She pulled herself together and asked me!
“How long has this been going on?”…She wants to know how long more than why and who? …god I cannot understand them. I thought to myself.
“I saw her a long time after I met you…she is nice and very….”
“Does she look better than me?” she jumped in without letting me finish the sentence
“Well…what kind of a question is this? You can’t compare yourself with others…why are you doing this?”
“Answer the question! Who is better?”
“I don’t know…you are different and so is she...…but she is definitely smaller than you!”
Oh my god! I can’t believe I said that….
Well…. folks…its been a good life so far…see you in next life…I am sure she is going grill me…
Aaaah! Surprisingly she did not react…
“Do you really mean it?” she asked with her voice shaking!
“Do you want the truth?”
“Yes”
“Yes!”…now I have handled the bigger issue …I might as well be more honest with her….I told that to my self…as I started saying….
“Listen…what I have with you beautiful…I agree…but with her its different…..with her…it feels like …am not the only one in to this whole thing…there are things from the other side as well…whereas with you…it feels like you are doing only what am telling you to do!?….I don’t know how to put this together…”
“So you are saying its over?”
“No baby…With you …it can never be over!…I can't imagine a life without you!”, I really meant that.
“What about her?”
“That’s the problem…she is getting important as well…I think I will want both of you to co-exist”
“Do you really mean that? Because it sounds crazy to me…and I don’t know why am not getting furious even after hearing what you just said”
“Honey…. you will have to understand…there are certain things in life that one need to know how to share and create harmony…I guess this is one of them….This weekend... I really need to go and spend some time with her…! I was with you all week…. I was with her as well…however I need to give this to her…. please understand”
“I guess don’t have an option here…do I?”
“I guess not!”
Then I had to do it…it was one of the most difficult things to do this weekend…!
I turned my computer off in pain…. but then I looked at my cell phone…and said we have the weekend for us sweetheart!
p.s. This is what you do when you have friday evenings all to yourself
“Yep. Pretty much!”, I said.
“Barath, I am having serious doubts about us”, she was concerned
“Listen…there is someone else..... as well”. I did not know where I had the guts to tell that to her
She was dumbfounded! She did not know how to react…!
She pulled herself together and asked me!
“How long has this been going on?”…She wants to know how long more than why and who? …god I cannot understand them. I thought to myself.
“I saw her a long time after I met you…she is nice and very….”
“Does she look better than me?” she jumped in without letting me finish the sentence
“Well…what kind of a question is this? You can’t compare yourself with others…why are you doing this?”
“Answer the question! Who is better?”
“I don’t know…you are different and so is she...…but she is definitely smaller than you!”
Oh my god! I can’t believe I said that….
Well…. folks…its been a good life so far…see you in next life…I am sure she is going grill me…
Aaaah! Surprisingly she did not react…
“Do you really mean it?” she asked with her voice shaking!
“Do you want the truth?”
“Yes”
“Yes!”…now I have handled the bigger issue …I might as well be more honest with her….I told that to my self…as I started saying….
“Listen…what I have with you beautiful…I agree…but with her its different…..with her…it feels like …am not the only one in to this whole thing…there are things from the other side as well…whereas with you…it feels like you are doing only what am telling you to do!?….I don’t know how to put this together…”
“So you are saying its over?”
“No baby…With you …it can never be over!…I can't imagine a life without you!”, I really meant that.
“What about her?”
“That’s the problem…she is getting important as well…I think I will want both of you to co-exist”
“Do you really mean that? Because it sounds crazy to me…and I don’t know why am not getting furious even after hearing what you just said”
“Honey…. you will have to understand…there are certain things in life that one need to know how to share and create harmony…I guess this is one of them….This weekend... I really need to go and spend some time with her…! I was with you all week…. I was with her as well…however I need to give this to her…. please understand”
“I guess don’t have an option here…do I?”
“I guess not!”
Then I had to do it…it was one of the most difficult things to do this weekend…!
I turned my computer off in pain…. but then I looked at my cell phone…and said we have the weekend for us sweetheart!
p.s. This is what you do when you have friday evenings all to yourself
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Aggravating Acronyms
“Is this your first meeting on the HS’s”
“uhhhh...Yes…”, I said with a pause! I guess I know what he is talking about…hmmm…do I?… What is HS?..…but before my brain cells Googled…
“You should have been for the JHS meeting man. These THS are kind of advanced you know, and is certainly not for a newbie. If you had been to the JHS, you would have understood the concepts much clearer…Never mind you will have your way through…. but am saying man ….I did not know that the DUDs and DURs means the same thing until I attended these JHS meetings…Anyways as you move on to the DHS you will know what we are talking about”, he said as he walked towards his cube.
“Did you realize that this is my second day at work and you are throwing acronyms left right and straight at me….”, I was yelling…well to myself!
Well, at that time, whatever you got from the earlier monologue is literally what I got as well. However, now, it’s different! As you work on.. you get the hang of it. But it makes one wonder. Why would we use acronyms so often?
Now with stores almost starting to sell Textotine patches for avoiding addictive text messaging, the use of acronyms is getting worse. To a certain extent, I understand the use.
Well, when you write a formal letter/report/article and you foresee using something quite frequently at a later stage…you parenthesize the acronym in the earlier stage and let the reader know this is what it means… In essence you do the same thing while you talk in business/working terms…you assume that the paranthesization stage has been crossed and that the person you are talking to, understand what you exactly mean when you say XYZ. Unfortunately that’s not the case all the time!
Now, even in the non-professional environment! In a room with people who might not have any clue on your daily routines! Dialogues like these do fill up some folk’s days!
“Machan…what about TOC?”
“Table of contents?”
“No. Taste of China”
“Okay…GTC?”
“Good ‘till cancelled?”
“No. General Tso’s Chicken”
“By the way AT&T is not working today”
“What?…that’s not true…! I just called…may be they are not working just for you! Did you check others?”
“No. They are not working today…I met them home…Aarthi, Tara and Tarun are not taking a break today”
“Dude..this is confusing. Lets go eat. On our way back, you wannu hit SBC for a HB?”
“Southern Baptist Convention? Why there now?”
“God! I meant Starbucks for a house blend…. Come on we need to HB soon?”
“You are so addicted to coffee bud”
“I meant hurry back soon”
Sure! These does happen in some of the folk's life ..the people I almost know/ew
For those who come to me in a non-professional environment with bundles of acronyms like Karan Johar movie titles…I politely let them read between the lines…. of a little more than half of my handful of fingers! Whereas in a professional environment … you sometimes don’t have the liberty to be yourself…in this case smudged with profanities…..so, I say…..I don’t know and I do not understand. By the way, that is very difficult!
Anyways, as we progress through time we need to realize that using an acronym is fine as long as it holds its value! If using them only leads to confusion and eats more of your time and brain cells…..a couple of seconds more on a conversation would certainly help.
All I am saying is bear with me..I am bored! :)
“uhhhh...Yes…”, I said with a pause! I guess I know what he is talking about…hmmm…do I?… What is HS?..…but before my brain cells Googled…
“You should have been for the JHS meeting man. These THS are kind of advanced you know, and is certainly not for a newbie. If you had been to the JHS, you would have understood the concepts much clearer…Never mind you will have your way through…. but am saying man ….I did not know that the DUDs and DURs means the same thing until I attended these JHS meetings…Anyways as you move on to the DHS you will know what we are talking about”, he said as he walked towards his cube.
“Did you realize that this is my second day at work and you are throwing acronyms left right and straight at me….”, I was yelling…well to myself!
Well, at that time, whatever you got from the earlier monologue is literally what I got as well. However, now, it’s different! As you work on.. you get the hang of it. But it makes one wonder. Why would we use acronyms so often?
Now with stores almost starting to sell Textotine patches for avoiding addictive text messaging, the use of acronyms is getting worse. To a certain extent, I understand the use.
Well, when you write a formal letter/report/article and you foresee using something quite frequently at a later stage…you parenthesize the acronym in the earlier stage and let the reader know this is what it means… In essence you do the same thing while you talk in business/working terms…you assume that the paranthesization stage has been crossed and that the person you are talking to, understand what you exactly mean when you say XYZ. Unfortunately that’s not the case all the time!
Now, even in the non-professional environment! In a room with people who might not have any clue on your daily routines! Dialogues like these do fill up some folk’s days!
“Machan…what about TOC?”
“Table of contents?”
“No. Taste of China”
“Okay…GTC?”
“Good ‘till cancelled?”
“No. General Tso’s Chicken”
“By the way AT&T is not working today”
“What?…that’s not true…! I just called…may be they are not working just for you! Did you check others?”
“No. They are not working today…I met them home…Aarthi, Tara and Tarun are not taking a break today”
“Dude..this is confusing. Lets go eat. On our way back, you wannu hit SBC for a HB?”
“Southern Baptist Convention? Why there now?”
“God! I meant Starbucks for a house blend…. Come on we need to HB soon?”
“You are so addicted to coffee bud”
“I meant hurry back soon”
Sure! These does happen in some of the folk's life ..the people I almost know/ew
For those who come to me in a non-professional environment with bundles of acronyms like Karan Johar movie titles…I politely let them read between the lines…. of a little more than half of my handful of fingers! Whereas in a professional environment … you sometimes don’t have the liberty to be yourself…in this case smudged with profanities…..so, I say…..I don’t know and I do not understand. By the way, that is very difficult!
Anyways, as we progress through time we need to realize that using an acronym is fine as long as it holds its value! If using them only leads to confusion and eats more of your time and brain cells…..a couple of seconds more on a conversation would certainly help.
All I am saying is bear with me..I am bored! :)
Friday, February 08, 2008
Am I up yet?
Beep…Beep…Beep….My eyes were frozen at the Couch as I let my brain roll back.
“Barath! Are you up? Its 4.00 am”, Appa started his day.
As I got up and thinking about walking, I also thought, what kind of a biological alarm this man should have to get up like this every day and act with such high levels of energy. What motivates him is what I was thinking?
“Chemistry” he said….
“Isn’t that what you were supposed to work on today?” he asked.
“Not decided pa”, I murmured as I stepped in to my morning premises.
How in the world does he knows what am I going to study. Well, I guess chemistry is what I like the most, so I will go with it.
As I stepped out, thinking what is ahead of me that day, I heard him say “Coffee!”.
I have to give this to him, I have never had a better coffee than what he makes. No Starbucks! No Seattle’s best. Nothing whatsoever. May be its because it was what I was brought up with. It certainly does not taste or look like a traditional coffee, but it has the something of its own that none can come near to.
The next 120 mins, just breezed away with me talking aromatic and aliphatic hyrdocarbons and responding to the early birds chirping.
"Take your shower and get ready! its time", he said.
In few minutes,
"Bring in your plate, guess Amma has some curd rice ready for you", he said.
By then I was uniformed getting set to grab the day by its horns.
"If I see a bit of lunch back in the box you know what would happen. And Do not dare to throw it on your way here", he sure can get loud.
"Coffee?” he asked as I entered back, after a proclaimed long day at work…. come on it was 3 pm.
"Yeah, of course! I thought you will have it already", I hated waiting.
"No, I was bored to do it all alone, I thought you will come back and we shall have the coffee together", he was genuinely bored.
After all, he was so lucky that his workplace was home, as he had to manage the entire South Indian Market via phone and other modes of communication. Man! He was and is lucky. But he also had no colleagues working at his workplace! Poor guy gets to meet them once in a while during his bi/annual meetings! Nevertheless he was bored.
"Its 4.30, let me make some curd rice for you before you go to the tuition at 5.00" he was just informing and not proposing, while I was wondering, why my life is filled with only curd rice, which is what I had for lunch as well...in any case I had better things to think about. Tuition girls and chemistry...!
"Hey...Barath is here. You will have to make him some dosas now" he was telling my mom while watching his 9.00 pm news.
Dosa? sounds nice.... and the intensity of that... of course could not even come closer to its taste. May be its because of my curd rice exposure all day, Dosa, chutney (molagai) powder and Sambar was terrific! Dinner is probably the heaviest meal of the day for me.. I am always stuffed with a full course meal.
"Dei, its time for your Badam milk!” …..He did not quit.
Is there any difference between offering and ordering in this world?
At the end of the day, I was just tired to hear anything related to food. As a matter of fact all day I was hearing only one thing...its something that’s related to food.... Whatever! Go ahead and drink...you have an hour of Math ahead of you at 10.15 pm I told to myself…
“Barath! Are you up? Its 4.00 am”, I heard him say again.
Beep…beep…beep. The microwave reminded me about my Quaker oats.
1995! sure does feel like a long time ago. Lots of things have changed. I learnt to interact with and through machines, learnt to live without constant intake…and lots more.
Father! …Sure! He was annoying sometimes with too much caring…! At the end of time, I guess he really don’t care….may be he knew that there will be days, when he had to give up his son to machines…..
Most of the times we talk about time flying and things changing so fast…. but there are only some times we wish for it to be frozen…. and it almost never happens when you are on it! Memory is something I bow down to! …I think I should remember his birthday tomorrow and wish him! I will call him on his cell phone and wish him is what I promised to myself...After all, I have learnt to survive through machines. When would I learn to live through it? Is a question that will never be answered?
“Its 7:30 am, and I am ready for breakfast” I told to myself. …But am I up yet? I questioned.
“Barath! Are you up? Its 4.00 am”, Appa started his day.
As I got up and thinking about walking, I also thought, what kind of a biological alarm this man should have to get up like this every day and act with such high levels of energy. What motivates him is what I was thinking?
“Chemistry” he said….
“Isn’t that what you were supposed to work on today?” he asked.
“Not decided pa”, I murmured as I stepped in to my morning premises.
How in the world does he knows what am I going to study. Well, I guess chemistry is what I like the most, so I will go with it.
As I stepped out, thinking what is ahead of me that day, I heard him say “Coffee!”.
I have to give this to him, I have never had a better coffee than what he makes. No Starbucks! No Seattle’s best. Nothing whatsoever. May be its because it was what I was brought up with. It certainly does not taste or look like a traditional coffee, but it has the something of its own that none can come near to.
The next 120 mins, just breezed away with me talking aromatic and aliphatic hyrdocarbons and responding to the early birds chirping.
"Take your shower and get ready! its time", he said.
In few minutes,
"Bring in your plate, guess Amma has some curd rice ready for you", he said.
By then I was uniformed getting set to grab the day by its horns.
"If I see a bit of lunch back in the box you know what would happen. And Do not dare to throw it on your way here", he sure can get loud.
"Coffee?” he asked as I entered back, after a proclaimed long day at work…. come on it was 3 pm.
"Yeah, of course! I thought you will have it already", I hated waiting.
"No, I was bored to do it all alone, I thought you will come back and we shall have the coffee together", he was genuinely bored.
After all, he was so lucky that his workplace was home, as he had to manage the entire South Indian Market via phone and other modes of communication. Man! He was and is lucky. But he also had no colleagues working at his workplace! Poor guy gets to meet them once in a while during his bi/annual meetings! Nevertheless he was bored.
"Its 4.30, let me make some curd rice for you before you go to the tuition at 5.00" he was just informing and not proposing, while I was wondering, why my life is filled with only curd rice, which is what I had for lunch as well...in any case I had better things to think about. Tuition girls and chemistry...!
"Hey...Barath is here. You will have to make him some dosas now" he was telling my mom while watching his 9.00 pm news.
Dosa? sounds nice.... and the intensity of that... of course could not even come closer to its taste. May be its because of my curd rice exposure all day, Dosa, chutney (molagai) powder and Sambar was terrific! Dinner is probably the heaviest meal of the day for me.. I am always stuffed with a full course meal.
"Dei, its time for your Badam milk!” …..He did not quit.
Is there any difference between offering and ordering in this world?
At the end of the day, I was just tired to hear anything related to food. As a matter of fact all day I was hearing only one thing...its something that’s related to food.... Whatever! Go ahead and drink...you have an hour of Math ahead of you at 10.15 pm I told to myself…
“Barath! Are you up? Its 4.00 am”, I heard him say again.
Beep…beep…beep. The microwave reminded me about my Quaker oats.
1995! sure does feel like a long time ago. Lots of things have changed. I learnt to interact with and through machines, learnt to live without constant intake…and lots more.
Father! …Sure! He was annoying sometimes with too much caring…! At the end of time, I guess he really don’t care….may be he knew that there will be days, when he had to give up his son to machines…..
Most of the times we talk about time flying and things changing so fast…. but there are only some times we wish for it to be frozen…. and it almost never happens when you are on it! Memory is something I bow down to! …I think I should remember his birthday tomorrow and wish him! I will call him on his cell phone and wish him is what I promised to myself...After all, I have learnt to survive through machines. When would I learn to live through it? Is a question that will never be answered?
“Its 7:30 am, and I am ready for breakfast” I told to myself. …But am I up yet? I questioned.
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Modeling Human Behavior?!
Last week, I got a chance to meet a couple of my well-wishers who were blessed to begin their process of enjoying the world a few decades earlier than the day I started...They were almost as old as my aunts and uncles. The two have been introduced well to my antiques, way ahead of time and they certainly had an idea of what they were going to witness. Unfortunately, they were also exposed to the common (mis)understanding of the generic behavioral pattern of a PhD, and obviously was entangled in that line of thought as well. The fortunate part for these people is that I have never met them personally, but I was introduced and been taught about them well enough, so meeting them on a personal level was just a formality.
Now, the meeting part did take place. Yours truly took a few nano seconds to gel in. Upon completion of the few formalities, I was all myself. Spoke to these people non-stop for almost an hour. Made them come outside for a drive in to the town along with a bunch of my friends whom they already knew and have gotten comfortable with, even before they had met me..... Ended up in an icecream joint in a winter evening making sure to show that the world around one can be wilder with just icecreams.... All these time I was ofcourse talking (being myself) and when I was outside in a place with rhythms all over, I took a dip in to the music left straight and right by responding to the beats now and then.
So at the end of the hour long stint, the aunt said that that was somewhat in the grounds like....'oh my god....I really didnt know it was going to be this intense...If you go to India, people wouldnt believe that you have a graduate degree...'
Now, that is almost everyone's comment after they spend few mins with you-know-who in a non-professional environment. Why would that be? Why would we frame preconceived notions that are based on traditional generational behavior of human kinds of different ages. I am glad that the notions that the people I met that day conceived were volatile in a few moments and the folks were versatile and wise enough to comprehend that 'understanding and expecting something that are based on rules that were set from a sample space of diiferent aspects could be absolutely wrong'.
If we move a step back and take a thinking pill we would understand that everyone of us have been there and done that. We expect something based on what we know and told upon. Even sometimes through our own experiences but there are several instances we witness that our expectation have not penetrated the complete sample space.... Sometimes we even comfortably sit back and say 'exceptions are not examples'....
Well to preach the least, I think it would be reasonable to say that it is ideal to use the knowledge that we have gained through pattern recognition and our own personal experiences. However, to extrapolate that to every set of conditions and call the ones that does not fall well with in the predicatable error limits, as abnormalities would be absolutely wrong. I don't think modeling human behavior with high predictability is an easy task to accomplish. Even if that is possible, I would rather stay away from that equation and enjoy the limitations of accepting and appreciating people the way they are!
I guess I am trying to say that Sky is Blue :)
Now, the meeting part did take place. Yours truly took a few nano seconds to gel in. Upon completion of the few formalities, I was all myself. Spoke to these people non-stop for almost an hour. Made them come outside for a drive in to the town along with a bunch of my friends whom they already knew and have gotten comfortable with, even before they had met me..... Ended up in an icecream joint in a winter evening making sure to show that the world around one can be wilder with just icecreams.... All these time I was ofcourse talking (being myself) and when I was outside in a place with rhythms all over, I took a dip in to the music left straight and right by responding to the beats now and then.
So at the end of the hour long stint, the aunt said that that was somewhat in the grounds like....'oh my god....I really didnt know it was going to be this intense...If you go to India, people wouldnt believe that you have a graduate degree...'
Now, that is almost everyone's comment after they spend few mins with you-know-who in a non-professional environment. Why would that be? Why would we frame preconceived notions that are based on traditional generational behavior of human kinds of different ages. I am glad that the notions that the people I met that day conceived were volatile in a few moments and the folks were versatile and wise enough to comprehend that 'understanding and expecting something that are based on rules that were set from a sample space of diiferent aspects could be absolutely wrong'.
If we move a step back and take a thinking pill we would understand that everyone of us have been there and done that. We expect something based on what we know and told upon. Even sometimes through our own experiences but there are several instances we witness that our expectation have not penetrated the complete sample space.... Sometimes we even comfortably sit back and say 'exceptions are not examples'....
Well to preach the least, I think it would be reasonable to say that it is ideal to use the knowledge that we have gained through pattern recognition and our own personal experiences. However, to extrapolate that to every set of conditions and call the ones that does not fall well with in the predicatable error limits, as abnormalities would be absolutely wrong. I don't think modeling human behavior with high predictability is an easy task to accomplish. Even if that is possible, I would rather stay away from that equation and enjoy the limitations of accepting and appreciating people the way they are!
I guess I am trying to say that Sky is Blue :)
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Nothing
1981
Nothing in the world could have made me happier than the cream-and-red-plastic-duo, outsourcing noise to develop love and skills in peace and harmony.
1984
Nothing in the world could have stopped me from spending eternal hours of sheltered rubber and wood workouts rendering support to the search-and-extraction of the best from within.
1987
Nothing in the world could have been better than those few minutes of extended sunlight that would have led me to spend those unfinished businesses as priceless moments of glory.
1990
Nothing in the world could have hurt me more than that last sphere that was lost in the air to end the day of fun and frolic.
1993
Nothing in the world than you could have woken me up at those early Saturday hours to cycle all the way and do what I was doing as I was born to.
1996
Nothing in the world could have distracted me so much more than you from my devastating attempts of exploring my post high school educational adventures.
1999
Nothing in the world could have possibly even brought into the vicinity of the same feeling as holding a virgin to start the blissful few-hour celebration of pure passion.
2002
Nothing in the world could make me believe that there is one other thing than you that is holding my country of such diversity, together in such a tight union.
2005
Nothing in the world could have made me realize that winning in union is more powerful than just winning, and winning is not everything!
Now
Nothing, I repeat, nothing in any form has been with me all my time than you, and I am still searching for that one thing in the world that could possibly fill the voids you have created in my life now.
Cricket. I miss you!
Nothing in the world could have made me happier than the cream-and-red-plastic-duo, outsourcing noise to develop love and skills in peace and harmony.
1984
Nothing in the world could have stopped me from spending eternal hours of sheltered rubber and wood workouts rendering support to the search-and-extraction of the best from within.
1987
Nothing in the world could have been better than those few minutes of extended sunlight that would have led me to spend those unfinished businesses as priceless moments of glory.
1990
Nothing in the world could have hurt me more than that last sphere that was lost in the air to end the day of fun and frolic.
1993
Nothing in the world than you could have woken me up at those early Saturday hours to cycle all the way and do what I was doing as I was born to.
1996
Nothing in the world could have distracted me so much more than you from my devastating attempts of exploring my post high school educational adventures.
1999
Nothing in the world could have possibly even brought into the vicinity of the same feeling as holding a virgin to start the blissful few-hour celebration of pure passion.
2002
Nothing in the world could make me believe that there is one other thing than you that is holding my country of such diversity, together in such a tight union.
2005
Nothing in the world could have made me realize that winning in union is more powerful than just winning, and winning is not everything!
Now
Nothing, I repeat, nothing in any form has been with me all my time than you, and I am still searching for that one thing in the world that could possibly fill the voids you have created in my life now.
Cricket. I miss you!
Friday, September 07, 2007
Choices
Recently, I was in one of the situations where I had to make a decision from an available set of options. That situation actually magnified the positives and negatives of having two seemingly right options.
I think I am paraphrasing Rishi Kapoor (or Kunal Kohli) from Fana (Thanks for subtitles). “The choice isn't between good and evil. That's easy. The real choices of life are choosing between...the lesser of two evils, or the greater of two goods”. In a polarized environment I was thinking that I would not have anything to learn from a movie of that caliber…. A Hindi movie of all cases…?! Well, another lesson from the invisibility!
Unfortunately, most of the time, we are not in a planet where we can differentiate options as good and evil. It is possibly a no-brainer when you have to make an option between two choices that are right and wrong. However when it comes to two right (or wrong) options, your choice is all about your character. Again, calling it right or wrong is completely ones own personal perspective…!
But after going through such a state of mind, I can now say that it is definitely not easy to stay focused and believe in what you believe. Especially, with all these different levels of distractions that one is exposed to. But it is certainly achievable. The path that led to my decision sounds pretty simple but in reality it was not so. I laid down all the possible pros and cons of both options. I compared both and the better one of the two wins…! Ala la la la…! I wish it was that simple. The positives and negatives that I had were on a different plane of perception in a way that I could not possibly fathom. Segregating them was a totally different ball game that I did not step in to. Two right paths that would lead to two different destinations of similar caliber.
Well, one of the major factors that helped me pursuing in the direction that I am now, is the feeling called ‘regret’. I have never believed in the word “regret”, not for once I want to go through that in my life, as it would never let me appreciate the experience that I went through, the way I want to perceive. I stood back and asked myself if I would regret making the decision if I am going through the other one..! In one of the options that I had, there was a tinge of that feeling based on ethical arguments. However, the difficulty of the situation was on a standpoint of definitions of ethical guidelines and who is the author of those? Is that ruled by morals or predefined set of rules framed by someone that you have never seen or will never see in the future.
Well, let me not bore you with ‘what’s going on with my life’ post. The take home message from the experience I went through was this,
Taking a stand in your decision defines what you call for yourself as a character. While doing so there could be several distractions that would obstruct your decision pattern. Stick on to your fundamental feeling of righteousness and win the pride of doing the right thing, at least for your own self.
I think I am paraphrasing Rishi Kapoor (or Kunal Kohli) from Fana (Thanks for subtitles). “The choice isn't between good and evil. That's easy. The real choices of life are choosing between...the lesser of two evils, or the greater of two goods”. In a polarized environment I was thinking that I would not have anything to learn from a movie of that caliber…. A Hindi movie of all cases…?! Well, another lesson from the invisibility!
Unfortunately, most of the time, we are not in a planet where we can differentiate options as good and evil. It is possibly a no-brainer when you have to make an option between two choices that are right and wrong. However when it comes to two right (or wrong) options, your choice is all about your character. Again, calling it right or wrong is completely ones own personal perspective…!
But after going through such a state of mind, I can now say that it is definitely not easy to stay focused and believe in what you believe. Especially, with all these different levels of distractions that one is exposed to. But it is certainly achievable. The path that led to my decision sounds pretty simple but in reality it was not so. I laid down all the possible pros and cons of both options. I compared both and the better one of the two wins…! Ala la la la…! I wish it was that simple. The positives and negatives that I had were on a different plane of perception in a way that I could not possibly fathom. Segregating them was a totally different ball game that I did not step in to. Two right paths that would lead to two different destinations of similar caliber.
Well, one of the major factors that helped me pursuing in the direction that I am now, is the feeling called ‘regret’. I have never believed in the word “regret”, not for once I want to go through that in my life, as it would never let me appreciate the experience that I went through, the way I want to perceive. I stood back and asked myself if I would regret making the decision if I am going through the other one..! In one of the options that I had, there was a tinge of that feeling based on ethical arguments. However, the difficulty of the situation was on a standpoint of definitions of ethical guidelines and who is the author of those? Is that ruled by morals or predefined set of rules framed by someone that you have never seen or will never see in the future.
Well, let me not bore you with ‘what’s going on with my life’ post. The take home message from the experience I went through was this,
Taking a stand in your decision defines what you call for yourself as a character. While doing so there could be several distractions that would obstruct your decision pattern. Stick on to your fundamental feeling of righteousness and win the pride of doing the right thing, at least for your own self.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Update!
Folks...
Looks like time has showered some positivities across and hence I have renounced some of the tags that I possessed (or the ones possessed me) for a while! For instance, the “Student” and “no- time” tags. Now that I absolutely have only knowledge transfer and vacation to be pursued for the next few weeks….I thought I should get back and do what I like to do when am running short of things to do……Blogging is what I proclaim that as.
It’s been ages since I shared the air in the blogosphere…and it looks like the air is being polluted in the absence of personal consistency. I see a whole bunch of people writing personal diaries online …and randomly ctrl+c and ctrl+v forwards and pictures. .. and calling them blogs. …Well, let me not be judgmental here…all am here to say here is that the air that I shared in the sphere a few months ago has been modified in a way I cannot digest…! So here am trying to do the MJ thing by coming back…not as a Wizard …but as a Bull though!
Thanks for those who kept pushing to write more and visiting. See you all soon with more words!
Looks like time has showered some positivities across and hence I have renounced some of the tags that I possessed (or the ones possessed me) for a while! For instance, the “Student” and “no- time” tags. Now that I absolutely have only knowledge transfer and vacation to be pursued for the next few weeks….I thought I should get back and do what I like to do when am running short of things to do……Blogging is what I proclaim that as.
It’s been ages since I shared the air in the blogosphere…and it looks like the air is being polluted in the absence of personal consistency. I see a whole bunch of people writing personal diaries online …and randomly ctrl+c and ctrl+v forwards and pictures. .. and calling them blogs. …Well, let me not be judgmental here…all am here to say here is that the air that I shared in the sphere a few months ago has been modified in a way I cannot digest…! So here am trying to do the MJ thing by coming back…not as a Wizard …but as a Bull though!
Thanks for those who kept pushing to write more and visiting. See you all soon with more words!
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Trying to Graduate!
Busy to blog?....Naa...Guess I'm Lazy...Will be back soon before graduation!
Thanks for visiting!
Monday, July 17, 2006
Mono or Di(e)alogue
Let me see if I can articulate what I am thinking now!
Is it possible to talk and make sure that we are not boring the other person by talking whatever we wanted to talk?
Did it come near to what I wanted to say…?
Naaa - not exactly….it's confusing!
Okay…once again!
Is there a faint possibility to talk and not bore the person that you are talking to!!
Now?
How about a ….NO!
Okay…last attempt!
Can I talk to anyone, whatever I want to talk, and can I do that in a way that I don't bore them?
Well! To hell with this!
Why don't I take a post to do this?…Okay..! here I go!
Everyday, there are quite a few instances…I have people talking to me for a while and all I can see is there mouth moving! Because, what they talk is no way related to my vicinity of interest, inclination, knowledge, affinity…or whatever it is. They would just talk and talk and talk without even paying attention to the fact that I am not listening to them!!
I used to scream….
"Oh God! Can't you instill some slightest amount of sense in to this people's brain cells? Can't you see that my responses are just smiles, sounds and start-and-end with just one-word most of the times!"
For once, God laughed the heavenly a** out and said "Try listening to yourself"!!
May be I sound like that to a lot of people! "HELL! YEAH!" ….a crowd shouted right behind me!!!
Good that I have that infinitesimal sense to acknowledge it.
"Could it be possible to change?" I asked myself…!
"Why don't you write a blog on it? May be you will follow atleast for the heck of it once you post it …" said the idealist in me!
A few sensible moments on anything would lead to decent way out of a tough situation.
What do we have here?
Target: Conversation
Constraints:
1. We need to make sure we don't bore the opponent (sometimes it could be a crowd)
2. We need to gain something out of it.
Every situation in this world is not a win-win kind. However, we can try our best and proceed to the maximum extent we can!
The solution here… obviously lies on the Topic of conversation!
The key to talk and not bore someone is to engage them on a topic of their own interest….! The most amazing thing about people around you is that the area of specialization and knowledge is markedly different from one soul to another. And the best part is that, to a certain extent it would overlap with yours, depending upon your versatility and tolerance limit….Well, in this case even if you are not knowledgeable on their interests, you would end up learning something from them…there you go…you gain something.
Now…am I missing something here….if I keep on talking about their interests…? What about mine? How in the world would I get to talk what I want to talk? I mean my interests my hobbies…my inclinations…affinities etc.
I have one word for you! Reciprocation!
Most of the people reciprocate when you listen to them. When you talk about their interests, find a way to connect to your passions, your interests. When you do so? It's easy for the other to respond and react to your affinities. Don't you think? Or am I missing something?
What about the people who don't reciprocate and not listen to your interests and talks? Well, you know what? They really don't know what they are missing! And after all you have gained something by listening to them…don't you think?
Life is simple! All you have to do is to acknowledge your likes and dislikes and practice it on others as well. Once you know how not to something that you dont want to see from others, its get beautiful!
And the next time I bore you…make sure that the sounds, one-word responses and "get the hell outta here" looks ….as obvious as you can!
Is it possible to talk and make sure that we are not boring the other person by talking whatever we wanted to talk?
Did it come near to what I wanted to say…?
Naaa - not exactly….it's confusing!
Okay…once again!
Is there a faint possibility to talk and not bore the person that you are talking to!!
Now?
How about a ….NO!
Okay…last attempt!
Can I talk to anyone, whatever I want to talk, and can I do that in a way that I don't bore them?
Well! To hell with this!
Why don't I take a post to do this?…Okay..! here I go!
Everyday, there are quite a few instances…I have people talking to me for a while and all I can see is there mouth moving! Because, what they talk is no way related to my vicinity of interest, inclination, knowledge, affinity…or whatever it is. They would just talk and talk and talk without even paying attention to the fact that I am not listening to them!!
I used to scream….
"Oh God! Can't you instill some slightest amount of sense in to this people's brain cells? Can't you see that my responses are just smiles, sounds and start-and-end with just one-word most of the times!"
For once, God laughed the heavenly a** out and said "Try listening to yourself"!!
May be I sound like that to a lot of people! "HELL! YEAH!" ….a crowd shouted right behind me!!!
Good that I have that infinitesimal sense to acknowledge it.
"Could it be possible to change?" I asked myself…!
"Why don't you write a blog on it? May be you will follow atleast for the heck of it once you post it …" said the idealist in me!
A few sensible moments on anything would lead to decent way out of a tough situation.
What do we have here?
Target: Conversation
Constraints:
1. We need to make sure we don't bore the opponent (sometimes it could be a crowd)
2. We need to gain something out of it.
Every situation in this world is not a win-win kind. However, we can try our best and proceed to the maximum extent we can!
The solution here… obviously lies on the Topic of conversation!
The key to talk and not bore someone is to engage them on a topic of their own interest….! The most amazing thing about people around you is that the area of specialization and knowledge is markedly different from one soul to another. And the best part is that, to a certain extent it would overlap with yours, depending upon your versatility and tolerance limit….Well, in this case even if you are not knowledgeable on their interests, you would end up learning something from them…there you go…you gain something.
Now…am I missing something here….if I keep on talking about their interests…? What about mine? How in the world would I get to talk what I want to talk? I mean my interests my hobbies…my inclinations…affinities etc.
I have one word for you! Reciprocation!
Most of the people reciprocate when you listen to them. When you talk about their interests, find a way to connect to your passions, your interests. When you do so? It's easy for the other to respond and react to your affinities. Don't you think? Or am I missing something?
What about the people who don't reciprocate and not listen to your interests and talks? Well, you know what? They really don't know what they are missing! And after all you have gained something by listening to them…don't you think?
Life is simple! All you have to do is to acknowledge your likes and dislikes and practice it on others as well. Once you know how not to something that you dont want to see from others, its get beautiful!
And the next time I bore you…make sure that the sounds, one-word responses and "get the hell outta here" looks ….as obvious as you can!
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Educate your way out
A few weeks ago I got to see an ABC episode on India rising, which is pretty old and popular in the blogosphere now. Though this episode had its own pluses and minuses, I liked it! Especially some parts where, the Sardar's response to the host's "Is India catching up?" question, and a don't-judge-the-book-by-its-cover person asking for an email address, so on and so forth! A patriot's view I guess!
The final few seconds of the show is what I was gripped upon.
"In India, education is worshiped…. and parents will skip meals to send them to private schools…."
How true!
A few years ago, a group of us had a discussion on this same issue. So, my connectivity-speed to those lines of thoughts was obvious and immeasurably fast.
To reiterate, in India, it is true that the middle/lower class families, in a way, skip meals to provide a reasonably high quality education to their kids. It is true that the reverence to education and educators are injected into each and every kid's brain from infancy. It is true that education is worshipped!
I was brought up that way! I saw and lived a life where people were sent to schools that were beyond their quality of lifestyle. Most of the time, the monetary struggle to make this happen was transparent that the responsibility automatically seeps in. At that age, with that brought up, the best thing that the kid can do is to educate their way out! The kid without his/her knowledge realizes this at a very early age. A single digit class rank is the most important thing in the world for almost every responsible student in the class. If parents skip meals, students skip fun, sometimes. As I said earlier here, there are a whole bunch of students who did not do what they wanted to do just to fit in this 'educate your way out' lifestyle.
Is this good? Are we in the right direction?....are the obvious questions that pop up. One of the dangerous byproducts of education is sensibility. Well, with exceptions apart, it's simple! Education breeds sensibility and in turn results in responsibility and growth in the right direction. So, a better educated society will proceed in a progressive direction much faster than the one which is less educated!
Presently, the society that we live in is afraid of being left uneducated! The spirit of competitiveness is so strong that we are just doing what we are supposed to do without thinking about what we deserve! "Once you start thinking what you deserve you become soft - Greg Popovich". Do what you are supposed to do and do that in style, what you supposed to get will automatically fall in! I am not talking Karma theory here…! What I am trying to say is to stop cribbing and start living!
This argument may have a completely different perception if you take the reservation issues into consideration, which I don't want to delve in to. Nevertheless, we are going great guns on the first step! Educate yourself first to start fighting the next step…!
As I said earlier, lot of people did not have the luxury to do what they want to do to fit in and live a life devoid of mediocrity. We have loads of Sachin's and A.R.Rehmans living a mediocre lifestyle instead of taking the road that's less taken! But education and the fear of it in this generation is a beautiful progression that's going to lead the next to take the leap in what they don't call as just survival. From there may be we can see our way out and talk about other plausible deficiencies, if any.
The final few seconds of the show is what I was gripped upon.
"In India, education is worshiped…. and parents will skip meals to send them to private schools…."
How true!
A few years ago, a group of us had a discussion on this same issue. So, my connectivity-speed to those lines of thoughts was obvious and immeasurably fast.
To reiterate, in India, it is true that the middle/lower class families, in a way, skip meals to provide a reasonably high quality education to their kids. It is true that the reverence to education and educators are injected into each and every kid's brain from infancy. It is true that education is worshipped!
I was brought up that way! I saw and lived a life where people were sent to schools that were beyond their quality of lifestyle. Most of the time, the monetary struggle to make this happen was transparent that the responsibility automatically seeps in. At that age, with that brought up, the best thing that the kid can do is to educate their way out! The kid without his/her knowledge realizes this at a very early age. A single digit class rank is the most important thing in the world for almost every responsible student in the class. If parents skip meals, students skip fun, sometimes. As I said earlier here, there are a whole bunch of students who did not do what they wanted to do just to fit in this 'educate your way out' lifestyle.
Is this good? Are we in the right direction?....are the obvious questions that pop up. One of the dangerous byproducts of education is sensibility. Well, with exceptions apart, it's simple! Education breeds sensibility and in turn results in responsibility and growth in the right direction. So, a better educated society will proceed in a progressive direction much faster than the one which is less educated!
Presently, the society that we live in is afraid of being left uneducated! The spirit of competitiveness is so strong that we are just doing what we are supposed to do without thinking about what we deserve! "Once you start thinking what you deserve you become soft - Greg Popovich". Do what you are supposed to do and do that in style, what you supposed to get will automatically fall in! I am not talking Karma theory here…! What I am trying to say is to stop cribbing and start living!
This argument may have a completely different perception if you take the reservation issues into consideration, which I don't want to delve in to. Nevertheless, we are going great guns on the first step! Educate yourself first to start fighting the next step…!
As I said earlier, lot of people did not have the luxury to do what they want to do to fit in and live a life devoid of mediocrity. We have loads of Sachin's and A.R.Rehmans living a mediocre lifestyle instead of taking the road that's less taken! But education and the fear of it in this generation is a beautiful progression that's going to lead the next to take the leap in what they don't call as just survival. From there may be we can see our way out and talk about other plausible deficiencies, if any.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
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